What is a ZenCricket?

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And why make reference to one?

“A Loud Cricket means Money is Coming”  ~ Chinese Superstition

In matters of Chinese folklore, the cricket has played a critical role. Throughout history, they have symbolized intelligence and good fortune. In fact, if a person were to harm a cricket, it was believed they would have great misfortune. Even today, in parts of eastern Asia, the male cricket will be caged so people can enjoy their song.

Have followed and put to practical use the teachings of Buddha and Eastern Philosophy for many years. The more recent years have wondered what kind of bad mojo I got mucked through in my younger days to warrant this illness. With that mindset, I trekked away from the teachings. Only recently have come back to the way. Has been my goal to walk the path to enlightenment. Without it, is much too hard to cope.

I look for harmony in all aspects of my life = Zen.

Cricket, because that was my best friend’s name in grade school. I don’t know whatever happened to her.

 

Before Illness Blighted My Enthusiasm …

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This is who I once was

“The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.”  ~ Walter Bagehot

I’m an independent, hard-working, single-mothering of two boys, lazy afternoon nap-taking, beer-slurping, wine-sipping, coffee-guzzling, book-reading, online gamer-geeking, CSI watching, wall rappelling, camp going, fish catching, cookout loving, one-liner telling, hair twirling, forever smiling, chocolate scarfing, weird face making, don’t have to look at the keyboard typing, mood swinging, pool shooting, flower sniffing, green thumb owning, bath loving, Brat acting, family valuing woman living a small town life with a big city attitude. *walks away singing* … I feel pretty .. oh so pretty. 🙂

 

 

 Now, Everyday is an Endeavor …

of Physical Strength and Mental Stability.

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This is who I am today living with chronic illness.

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.”  ~ Confucius

No longer independent. Now a burden upon my grown sons and their lovelies. Completely reliant upon gadgetry to remind me to take medication at exact times throughout the day because I can no longer rely on my own memory. Had to say “So long” to my truck of over a decade because I can no longer drive safely. Can barely walk without the help of a walker. Seldom get out of bed but to go across the hallway to the bathroom and to regular doctor’s appointments.  Through it all, the good, bad and downright plain ugly, I keep on keeping on.

In the process of, “out with the old, in the new” as far as the team of doctors I have in my corner.  Seems the ones I’ve had for years no longer want to listen or even care.  This is my journey through the muck of chronic illnesses such as …

  • Fibromyalgia
  • Bipolar Depression
  • PTSD
  • Agoraphobia
  • Severe Anxiety Disorder
  • PNES (Psychogenic nonepileptic seizures)
  • Cluster Headache
  • Lynch Syndrome (MSH2)
  • IBS
  • Ulnar Nerve Neuropathy

 

Every day, I am Reminded that I am …

The Enigma

Wrapped in a DNA Encoded Riddle