I’ve dealt with anxiety for so long, I don’t know anymore what it feels like to not have it on a daily basis. Yet, lately, it’s been acting up to a much greater level than I’ve had to deal with in a long time. I’ve been searching for the “why” in this whole nightmare but, it eludes me.
Yesterday I went for a G.I. specialist appointment. It was a meet and greet as I was establishing a new patient spot and going over personal medical history along with family medical history during this appointment. However, anxiety levels were so high, all I could think about was bolting outta that little room right past the doctor when he opened the door to come into the exam room. Of course, I didn’t actually bolt. I bumbled my way through. The full effects of the anxiety didn’t actually settle down till several hours, a meditation session, and two anti-anxiety meds later.
First thing this morning, I’m having terrible dizzy spells where the whole room spins along with the anxiety. Upsetting combo! Is making me sick to my stomach. I believe today is a stay in bed and rest kinda day. Decided to drink some calming tea and turn on my diffuser with some sandalwood in it. That usually helps.
For now, I’m going to try and spend up some of this nervous energy and rearrange my room a bit more. Am tired of the same ol’ same, dirty room. It’s in need of some T.L.C.